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Face-lift
Temporary restoration of the visage we wore in youth, but one size smaller. |
Factionalism
The abiding human need to create group conflicts based on religion, politics, race, gender, class or whether toilet paper should be pulled over or under the roll. |
Fact
A folly committed by enough of the right people to confer on it the badge of status. |
Fans
Modern descendants of the Dionysiacs of ancient Greece, who would customarily devour the object of their worship. |
Farmer
1. Head of an efficient multimillion-pound business that manufactures chemically enhanced animal and vegetable products for nationwide consumption. 2. A sturdy yeoman who sweated over the soil, took pride in his labour, fed the good people of his county, and produced an unbroken chain of descendants to inherit his humble patch of earth - until one of them sold out to a property developer and absconded with the loot. |
Fascism
Nationalism with obsessive-compulsive tendencies. Fashion Today's rage, tomorrow's chuckle. |
Fast-food Restaurants
Tidy, congenial roadside bistros that clog the nation's highways and the arteries of their patrons. |
Fast Track
Evidence that corporations help those whom God would help anyway. |
Fax
A modern enhancement of the telephone, enabling us to send and receive illegible information in seconds; also ideal for communicating bad news without the inconvenience of having to talk to the person at the other end. |
Federal Budget
In the U.S., a miraculous machine that continually cranks out more money than it takes in; unfortunately not yet licensed for use in the home. |
