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Depression
An affliction of individuals or economies that have tumbled into a well with ice-coated walls; if no help arrives, one has little choice but to keep amused and wait for a thaw. |
Designer Label
A minuscule patch of material that, whether concealed or in open view, automatically doubles the price of any object it adorns. Once confined to original garments in exclusive cosmopolitan boutiques; now likely to be seen on everything from sweatsuits to prosthetic kneecaps. |
Developer
A magician who commands shopping malls and business parks to appear on the ruins of historic sites, family farms, woodlands and widows' homes. |
Dictator
The alpha male in a tribe of baboons. Diet The temporary triumph of will over metabolism. |
Differently Abled
Abled apart from the norm; enjoying an unusual level of ableness, so to speak. The preferred, socially correct euphemism (as of this writing) for handicapped, which in its day was a passable euphemism for the needlessly honest crippled. |
Dinner Theatre
An establishment that cleverly escapes judgement on the quality of its food by distracting its patrons with a lively show, and likewise eludes criticism of its entertainment by keeping the jaws of the audience continuously occupied with more substantial fare. |
Dinosaurs
1. A clan of awesome Mesozoic beasts now thought to be the ancestors of the chicken. 2. Any other oversized, ill-adapted creatures doomed to eventual extinction; e.g., dirigibles, ocean liners, the Soviet Union or major TV networks. |
Directions
How to get from Point A to Point B, preferably without encountering Points C, K or Q along the way. Something a real man never asks for when lost on the open road, at least in the presence of a female passenger; instead, he deploys his gender-based internal compass, comments on the rustic beauty of the scenic route and prays for a familiar landmark. |
Disadvantaged
Denied the privilege (according to white middle-class sociologists) of having been born to white middle-class parents. |
Disco
The thumping mutant offspring of rock music, electronically engineered until all vestiges of humanity have been successfully extirpated. Flourished in the late 1970s, esp. among trendy urbanites, who would trail clouds of white powder as they lined up at clubs with entrance standards to rival those of Imperial College. |
