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Cremation
The fairly common practice of flame-broiling the deceased; a dose of hellfire with or without damnation. |
Cricket
A venerable English gentleman's game rarely won in worldwide competition by English gentlemen. |
Critic, Literary
A solemn interpreter who listens to the ravings of modern poets and fictionmeisters, then pretends to translate them for a sceptical public. One who rhapsodizes over the most perversely obscure works because they make his job necessary. |
Critic, Theatre
A skulking submarine that can sink an entire production with one well-aimed torpedo. |
Critical
Acutely diseased, acutely displeased or, in the case of those who remain conscious while receiving last rites, both diseased and displeased. |
Cruise
1. n An opportunity for middle-class voyagers to consume mass quantities of food and drink, pursue short-term romance, vomit periodically and take snapshots of an island or port between meals. 2. vb To pursue short-term romance without the aid of a boat. |
Cryonics
The gentle art of freezing corpses, or parts thereof, in hope of resurrecting them as future dinner guests or talking heads. |
Cuddling
A sweetly chaste form of intimacy that tends to make the average man feel like a muzzled hound on a fox hunt. |
Cult
An in-crowd that accepts misfits on the condition that they surrender their souls and occasionally their lives; most inductees join without hesitation. |
Cult Film
A movie seen about fifty times by about that many people. |
