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Big Bang
The primordial slap on the backside of the newborn universe; a theory astronomers have sought to rechristen with a more suitably dignified name. This lexicographer humbly suggests Harold or Eunice. |
Bilingual Education
The attempt to integrate Welsh-speaking students into the mainstream as slowly as possible by keeping them fluent in their ancestral tongue. |
Billboard
An outdoor structure used for commercial purposes, like the Goodyear blimp or a willing Olympic gold medallist. |
Bimbo
Uncomplimentary appellation for a gaudy young woman with an impressive aptitude for latching onto moneyed men, despite (or perhaps because of) the fact that her combined bust and hip measurements tend to exceed her IQ. |
Biodegradable
Desirable to an environmentally aware consumer because of its tendency to decompose, preferably after being used. |
Birthing
Giving birth, esp. as practised by socially correct women who have attended classes on the subject in tandem with their sensitive mates. Gerund form of the verb to birth, conjugated in the present indicative as follows: I birth we birth thou birthest you birth he . births they birth. |
Bistro
A boutique that serves hot meals; notable for charmingly indecipherable handwritten menus that effectively disguise the prices. |
Black Hole
A celestial vacuum cleaner. |
Blame
Tossing the hot potato of responsibility to an innocent bystander, usually a male of Anglo-Saxon ancestry. |
Blockbuster
A movie seen by everyone, mainly because everyone is seeing it. Good news for producers who spend liberally on special effects to win an audience; bad news for modest films that have to resort to shameless gimmicks like poignancy or memorable acting. |
