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MOTHERS, YOUNG
Don't start that family too early, either: children of teenaged mothers are twice as likely to commit crimes. (Given what the children of older fathers are like, the perfect child except for its diabetes would have to have an old mother and a young father; so why do movies always show old men getting together with twenty-year-old girls?) |
MOUNTAINS
A study of people vacationing in the Colorado mountains found that 15 to 40 percent fall victim to mountain sickness, including major conditions such as high-altitude cerebral edema or pulmonary edema. Is "because it's there" really a good enough reason? |
MOVIES
More than one thousand studies show a causal relationship between violence in the media (including movies) and aggressive behavior in children, with measurable and long-lasting effects including emotional desensitization toward real-life violence. No, this does not mean you can sue Steven Spielberg because your daughter has been biting her little brother ever since she saw Jurassic Park IV. |
MOVIE STARS
Teenagers are more likely to smoke if movie stars they admire smoke on screen. Ban Casablanca and keep them on a diet of Forrest Gump and Rambo: they may end up stupid and homicidal, but at least they won't smoke. |
MOVING AROUND
The shorter the time you've lived in your current residence, the more likely you are to be a victim of violent crime. Play the odds: stay inside and don't unlock your door for the first year or two. |
MULTITASKING
Multitasking may mean that none of the multi tasks get done properly. It may also erode your ability to focus, persevere, and be patient, reflective, or tranquil. |
MUNITIONS PLANTS, WORKING AT
Workers exposed to toxic chemicals at a munitions plant were found to have reduced psychomotor speed, diminished manual dexterity and auditory verbal recall, and disturbance of emotional and visual function. People exposed to the munitions were even worse off. |
MUSICIAN, BEING A
Musicians are at risk for repetitive motion conditions including carpal tunnel syndrome and tendonitis, hearing loss, upper extremity musculoskeletal problems, dermatitis and other skin conditions resulting from holding instruments, and second-hand smoke exposure, as wet) as performance anxiety and sleep disturbances. It has not yet been proven that any or all of these conditions have anything to do with groupies, but dedicated researchers are working hard to find out. |
